Gotta Spend Just a Little More Time with You

There’s a woman in my church who opens her mouth and says insightful things. When men are leading debates at congregational meetings, she will stand up and speak with wisdom and compassion from a heart that is beautifully feminine. For years I admired her from a distance, until one day she called me and invited me to breakfast.

Having breakfast with Debbie would have been enough, but during our meal, she offered me compliments! She wanted me to know that she knew it must be hard to be single in our church, but that she saw me doing it gloriously. You could’ve knocked me over with a feather. Since that morning, I’ve met Debbie at her office (Panera Bread) many more times and I have been richly blessed by her example.

Whenever I’m meeting a woman with children, I assume five minutes of lateness per child (ex. a woman with two kids is usually ten minutes late). Debbie, though entitled to 25 minutes of late-grace, is always early for our meetings. Her five children are wonderful, but I have been particularly blessed to get to know her oldest who are in the youth group at church. They are polite, well-rounded, inquisitive and helpful. Her youngest only knows me as someone who visits her mother. When she saw me at VBS last week she told me, “My mommy’s not here.”

Debbie’s spiritual mothering extends to refugees in our community and to the women she mentors. It was Debbie who gave me the image of always having one hand reaching forward and one reaching behind—being a disciple-making disciple. This simple principle has really informed my vision for women’s ministry.

She is always busy, and yet somehow always at rest. Others are drawn to her. You may have to wait your turn to talk to her on a Sunday morning, or schedule a Panera appointment a few weeks in advance, but I assure you, a conversation with Debbie is well-worth the wait.